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10-15-2002, 12:31 AM | #1 |
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"This is How I Cry"
This Is How I Cry
When you see me crying, Like a bloody moon, Don’t ask why, I hold everything inside of me. And this is how I let, My feelings out. And this is how, You see my inside, The inside I don’t want to be noticed. This is how I cry, This is how I cry. Now let me show you, What hides, Deep within my soul. But I don’t want you to see me, Let me cry, Let me breakdown and wither. This is how I cry, This is how I cry. When I’m crying, Tearing down the walls, Of the prison in my head, Don’t try to ease my untamed mind. Don’t attempt to fix me. This is how I live day by day. So let me tear, Let me tear. This is my life, Welcome. This is how I cry, This is how I cry. Now let me show you, What hides, Deep within my soul. But I don’t want you to see me, Let me cry, Let me breakdown and wither. This is how I cry, This is how I cry. You know as well as I do, I am on a downfall. And I don’t need your help, I can hold all this in, Deal with it myself. So can you please push me away? Make me glad, And will you see the other side of me? So this is me, Me crying again. Can you see the inside of me now? It’s leaking out my eyes. Now you see what I see, Now you feel what I feel. But you don’t have a clue what I feel. You will never know my pain. And this is how I cry. This is how I cry, This is how I cry, This is how you see me. This is how I cry. this is spankin' new. I wrote it a ew days ago. What do you think? |
10-15-2002, 12:55 AM | #2 |
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Very good - sensitve and heartfelt, full of transparency and edgy!
Thanks for sharing!
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10-15-2002, 10:46 AM | #3 |
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Ditto souldancer! I liked it a lot.
However, The part that goes "When you see me crying, Like a bloody moon" I'm not getting... I didn't know a moon could be bloody and that a bloody moon cries... so how does a "bloody moon" cry? |
10-15-2002, 01:50 PM | #4 |
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Maybe CF is British? Just a thought....
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10-15-2002, 08:11 PM | #5 |
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Well...its just something in the song. Just a line. Its not British, im not either. I was sitting in the hall way at lunch at school one day, and just wrote it. I dont know where it came from.
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10-17-2002, 09:10 AM | #6 |
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great stuff,creedfaner!
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10-28-2002, 08:01 AM | #7 |
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Oh, totally. That's great. I like the line "Tearing down the walls/Of the prison in my head" Any allusion to our boys?? :P
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10-29-2002, 05:51 AM | #8 |
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lol
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11-16-2002, 01:48 AM | #9 |
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It's really good! Keep it up!
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11-17-2002, 06:58 PM | #10 |
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Hey, I liked it alot, some things could be changed to make the rythm go smoother like
When you see me crying, Like a bloody moon, Don’t ask why, I hold everything inside of me. And this is how I let, My feelings out. And this is how, You see my inside, The inside I don’t want to be noticed. Could go like this When you see me cry, Like a bloody moon, Don’t ask why, I hold everything inside of me. And this is how I let, My feelings out. And what you see, Is all that you get, So leave me alone, before I shout But its very electric, and the words are so vivid and very strong, I really like the part that goes like this Now you see what I see, Now you feel what I feel. But you don’t have a clue what I feel. You will never know my pain. Keep goin, you may make a good poet/songwriter, or maybe some day if its your dream, a singer. Don't get me wrong, I like the song, but it's just a bit of constructive critisism.
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11-17-2002, 08:01 PM | #11 |
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Thank you for changing that around, i dont mind at all. Thanks alot man! |
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