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01-11-2005, 07:02 PM
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#91 | ||
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okay stay around i'm going to type it up...so it wil up soon.....
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She never told a lie, Well, might of told a lie. But never lived one. Didn’t have a life. Didn’t have a life. But surely saved one. Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go. Tool Wings for Marie |
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01-11-2005, 07:17 PM
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#92 | ||
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Michael has just got back from hell on earth (Wellington) and he's glad to be back in a country that knows real football and where the women aren't 6 foot 2 and have goatees and moustaches. He would be glad if her never sees Hayley's Aunt.Mary ever again. He gets off the plane and has half an hour to wait for a taxi and so he gets something to eat in the airport food court. He is minding his own business when he gets a tap on the shoulder.
*Michael turns around in shock and someone touches his shoulder and sees a big pair of hands. He figures it must be a big and burly security guard and he did sneak some apples on to the plane. Michael: Mary what are you doing here? Mary: Well a woman of my age knows when a man is giving a signal and I had to follow true love. Michael: Signal? True love? Mary we were playing rugby and I was trying to run around you and you knocked me out? Mary: Its quiet alright don't be shy. Hayley is a sweet girl but an older woman like me has experience if you know what I mean. Hayley's Uncle Tom if he was around....bless his soul could tell you stories. I can teach you things that will drive you crazy. Michael: Ummm I really have to go, my taxi is waiting for me outside. Mary: I'm heading out that way to visit a relative, do you mind if I come? Michael: Ummm...Ummm yeah okay. The trip goes quietly and Michael is enjoying that until a hand comes upon his thigh from none other than Aunt.Mary. Michael: Uh what are you doing? Mary: We're both adults there is no need to feel so awkward. You can't fight love Michael. Us New Zealanders know how to please a man. Michael: A man or a sheep? *awkward laugh* Mary: Please don't offend my country, just relax. Michael: Really I would rather not, perhaps it would be better If I got another taxi. Taxi Driver: Is everything alright back there? Mary: Yes driver everything is fine....very fine. Okay I've come all this way but I can see your not interested. Can I at least have one kiss? Michael: *Recalls her deep voice, sees that she hasen't shaved in a couple of days, he thinks its like kissing a man. If I don't all hell could break loose here and she'll probably beat me to a bloody pulp.* Okay just one and then can we just leave eachother alone? Mary jumps on top of him and starts tearing off her clothes like a possessed animal revealing chest hair that he could only dream of possessing. The stink from those armpits causes the taxi driver to pass out and the car starts moving across the road and falls into a ditch. The driver put down a screen for "privacy" that is sound proof and now Michael is traped with this hideous monster.
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She never told a lie, Well, might of told a lie. But never lived one. Didn’t have a life. Didn’t have a life. But surely saved one. Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go. Tool Wings for Marie |
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01-11-2005, 09:07 PM
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#93 | ||
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LMAO
 Oh that's gross. Really gross. LOL. LOL  Oh man you're so great. Well done. My favourites would have probably had to be the shopping experiance, and when you met my parents.  So funny ...
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'See the world in Green and Blue Aotearoa right in front of you. See the land of the long white cloud Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south. Harbour lights in the City of Sails Aroha, the love that never fails See the bird with the leaf in her mouth After the flood all the colours came out.' - Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006 |
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04-02-2005, 01:26 AM
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#94 | ||
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Woah look what I found!
I have done something really good, heh. I have taken all of our chatting from most of the productive threads which we have been talking steadily in, and brought them to this thread which I think we should keep alive for the sake of everyone. Which suprisingly, is not that very many threads, LOL but we just talk alot in a few of them! Anyhow .... feel free to reply when you're ready
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'See the world in Green and Blue Aotearoa right in front of you. See the land of the long white cloud Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south. Harbour lights in the City of Sails Aroha, the love that never fails See the bird with the leaf in her mouth After the flood all the colours came out.' - Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006 |
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04-02-2005, 01:28 AM
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#95 | ||
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From the ‘19 year old guy needs woman advice!’ thread
No! Never! Well … maybe … but you’re not seeing it!  Oooh really? I like the sound of that!  Hehe. So what kind of story will you read me? From the ‘left or right?’ thread
No no that’s not right, it’s de ne ne ne ne naw …. Get it right …. LOL jk hehe From the ‘Random “who cares?” thoughts’ Thread
Hey yeah, those singlet’s are pretty cool! How about a wet-t competition! LMAO!! Ehehe. It was quite funny at the work party that we had lastnight, I had to get a guy that was working there to go and get my beer. And then they were all kidding around and telling me that I shouldn’t be drinking beer because I was underage! I only had a few which was nice. But oh man, do my colleagues get drunk easily! LOL.
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'See the world in Green and Blue Aotearoa right in front of you. See the land of the long white cloud Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south. Harbour lights in the City of Sails Aroha, the love that never fails See the bird with the leaf in her mouth After the flood all the colours came out.' - Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006 Last edited by - hayley - : 04-02-2005 at 01:31 AM. |
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04-02-2005, 03:59 AM
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#96 | ||
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oh this thread is back! so here we're allowed to act like a pair of hormone driven teenagers?
okay so i'm not technically not a teenager but i don't look a day over nineteen. besides your only as old you feel......hehe
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She never told a lie, Well, might of told a lie. But never lived one. Didn’t have a life. Didn’t have a life. But surely saved one. Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go. Tool Wings for Marie |
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04-02-2005, 04:07 AM
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#97 | ||
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oh its too late....i've already contacted your mum and she's going to be sending over all your baby photos.....or at least a few of them. she's even agreed to send over the ones where you are stark naked!
Once upon a time in a land far, far away lived a boy named Romeo and a girl named Juliet........................Romeo and Juliet kill themselves! The End....... LOL Oh I'm sorry Miss.Pefection! hell yeah! now this an idea i like! but won't a wet t-shirt expose my man boobies?  lol sound like aussies...any excuse for a piss up! LOL so drinking session every month at your workplace hey? any positions open?
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She never told a lie, Well, might of told a lie. But never lived one. Didn’t have a life. Didn’t have a life. But surely saved one. Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go. Tool Wings for Marie |
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04-02-2005, 04:51 AM
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#98 | ||
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I guess so! WOOO HOOO! Is anyone looking? No? GREAT ...
   Lol blimey we're a handful ... heheExactly ... so you're my age then, LOL. I thought my mother was acting strangely today! Hehe. Stark naked! NO! You don't need to see those ones, just wait until I come over and I'll give you a show! LMAO! As awful as that was, it still made me laugh. So you want me to have nightmares then? Give me a nice story, you're mean!  Ahhh I'm SO good at fake crying! .... hehe. Damn straight. Now stand up straight, puff our your chest, pull up your pants and tie up your shoes! Muahaha. LOL dude. I took a mouthful of water as I was reading that, and when I came to man boobies I actually choked. YOU MADE ME CHOKE! On my water! Thats evil, LMAO. Aha. Oh I'm sure they wouldn't mind a spunky new aussie joining the gang! Hehe. You could be my little slave ... muahahaha
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'See the world in Green and Blue Aotearoa right in front of you. See the land of the long white cloud Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south. Harbour lights in the City of Sails Aroha, the love that never fails See the bird with the leaf in her mouth After the flood all the colours came out.' - Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006 |
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04-02-2005, 06:00 AM
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#99 | ||
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In this thread the facists can't touch us! LOL
I at least need to be eighteen so I can drive and buy alcohol legally! LOL! btw my mum did find some of my baby photos the other day and i scanned those as well. they're not jpeg files so i can't put them on here, they're .jif files i think. so how much does it cost to see one of your shows? LMAO lol i'm the expert at grossing you out, yet still making you laugh! Okay Sleeping Beauty (thats you) has nasty spell cast on her and Prince Charming (thats me hehe) sets her free with a kiss! LOL The end...... yes MOTHER! haha *evil laugh* thats what you get when you pay for bottled water! *sips from bottle of fanta* lol But would I would be allowed to bombard them with NZ jokes all day? Hey we could have rendevous at the office on weekends!  LMAO
__________________
She never told a lie, Well, might of told a lie. But never lived one. Didn’t have a life. Didn’t have a life. But surely saved one. Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go. Tool Wings for Marie |
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04-04-2005, 07:36 PM
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#100 | ||
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LOL. Woo hoo we're free to be jackasses! Hehehe.
Good point .. okay you don't look a minute over 18! Haha now get in the car and drive, baby! Lol. I thought you could upload .jif files to Creed Feed? Hmm, maybe not. Would love to see them through email though!. Cost? Well .... hmm ... how much am I worth? Muahaha. Oooh I'm liking this story! Hahaha. What a good little boy. Now clean your room! Of course you could, well that's if you really want to put up with me laughing hysterically every day! LOL. Ooh, I like the sound of that, my desk is the perfect size! LOL that's gross .ehehehe
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'See the world in Green and Blue Aotearoa right in front of you. See the land of the long white cloud Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south. Harbour lights in the City of Sails Aroha, the love that never fails See the bird with the leaf in her mouth After the flood all the colours came out.' - Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006 |
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04-04-2005, 10:25 PM
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#101 | ||
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lets make a pledge! .....to keep this post of madness near the top of the page! do it for your country!
Hey maybe my parents enrolled me early and kept it a big secret! It would explain alot! Oh I like a woman who knows how to take charge! I tried but it wouldn't allow me to upload them. I'll email them to ya! I was supposed to do that a couple of days wasen't I? LOL How much are you worth? Well lets allow South Park to answer this question.....$2 sucky sucky love you long time!  LOL jk oh but thats it, story is over....did you not notice the end? yes my lady.....whatever you say.....how high would you like me to jump my lady? Its a bit uncomfortable on this desk don't you think?
__________________
She never told a lie, Well, might of told a lie. But never lived one. Didn’t have a life. Didn’t have a life. But surely saved one. Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go. Tool Wings for Marie |
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04-04-2005, 10:40 PM
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#102 | ||
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Oh you bet, no one will ever see the end of this thread!
For my country? Yeahh wooooo  lmaoHaha wouldn't that be the weirdest thing to find out. "Well Michael, you're actually 18" LOL. Yes I know how to take control, now bend over and get me that whip! Lmao. Okay cool, I will look out for them in my email. LMAO SUCKY SUCKY! Hahaha too funny .... $2? is that all I'm worth? No loving for you ...muaha No dang it you haven't gotten to the part where you carry me off into the sunset, you're not a good story teller! What are you talking about? Are the teddy's on my desk not soft enough for your delicate parts? hhah
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'See the world in Green and Blue Aotearoa right in front of you. See the land of the long white cloud Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south. Harbour lights in the City of Sails Aroha, the love that never fails See the bird with the leaf in her mouth After the flood all the colours came out.' - Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006 |
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04-04-2005, 10:52 PM
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#103 | ||
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australia and new zealand combined.....just like the anzacs! LOL
under the leadership of the two ugliest prime ministers ever....john howard and helen clark! lol that would be weird but i know its not true lol......i can remember every year back to four vividly. hey what did i say about sharp objects? oh i meant $2000.....i forget a couple of zeros! and the prince's shoe only fits on cinderella......they slow dance the night away and fall in love happily ever after! the end! LOL these teddys are totally killing my mojo!
__________________
She never told a lie, Well, might of told a lie. But never lived one. Didn’t have a life. Didn’t have a life. But surely saved one. Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go. Tool Wings for Marie |
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04-04-2005, 11:00 PM
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#104 | ||
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LOL you have a good point. How embarrasing for both of our countries .. LOL. Michael and Hayley for prime ministers I say! Ehehe.
How do you know? You DON'T! Lol just kidding Sharp objects ... not to stick them up your bum ... just the whip on the cheeks! Hahaha. That's sounding like a more healthier amount that I can handle! Lol ... so .. sucky sucky? LMAO we're so bad Awww! How lovely! So romantic .... hehehe. Lol .... but they're soft! And they're fluffy, and they're so cute.
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'See the world in Green and Blue Aotearoa right in front of you. See the land of the long white cloud Cape Reinga, to the fiords in the south. Harbour lights in the City of Sails Aroha, the love that never fails See the bird with the leaf in her mouth After the flood all the colours came out.' - Beautiful Day, Auckland, NZ - 24 Nov 2006 |
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04-05-2005, 01:40 AM
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#105 | ||
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My first role as Prime Minister of Australia will be a hostile takeover of our neighbours New Zealand. We shall murder, we shall destory and we shall conquor!
We will leave New Zealand with plague proportions of Kangaroos, Wombats, Koalas and Tasmanian Devils! hehehehe you're so naughty! hey what are you doing with that shaver? keep it away from that general area you wicked woman! Hey thats more than our girls make.....you should feel good about that! Then 10 years later the Prince loses his job and becomes an alcoholic whilst Cinderella gets really fat and they split up! The End....... Oh fluffy now don't you just love that word? But they're looking at me and I can't peform with an audience! LOL
__________________
She never told a lie, Well, might of told a lie. But never lived one. Didn’t have a life. Didn’t have a life. But surely saved one. Alright, now it’s time for us to let you go. Tool Wings for Marie |
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