Shaking Hands With Knives
 

Shaking Hands With Knives

Is this regret I taste or just more blood
A gun shot wound to the head or another dud
I'm dancing around the truth again
And I'm so familiar to being foreign

To tell you the truth, I'm trying
To tell you the truth, I'm crying

Is this black or white or shades of gray
Is this when everything will pass away
I'm dancing on my own grave again
And I'm writing the end with pencil, not pen
All so I can erase my future like I did my past
When I was the winner that still came in last

To tell you the truth, I'm lying
To tell you the truth, I'm dying

Playing God with our own lives
Is like shaking hands with knives
Soon enough to get cut and bled
Soon to lay as waste amongst the dead

Is this regret I taste or just more blood.

:jam: :jam: :jam: :jam: :jam: :jam: Awsome as always i would,nt dare to tell you kevs how to write all though your titles perfect but i would have called > :)thats it in a nutshell :D

hey mr seeker hold on to this advice if you can see than you can fly. I can tell by this you are a staind fan. this is good writing if you have put it to music id like to hear it

MrSeeker, great job! LOVE that last part!

Love the Title. Makes me want to continue reading.


I really like that first line. Very good. The second line is weak though, and you know it. "dud"? Just doesn't fit in a song this somber. You don't have to rhyme, especially when it is that forced. The last two liens are pretty generic, nothing bad or good really.


Meh. More generic stuff.


The first three lines are all cliches. It would be better to avoid cliches, especially three in a row, unless you make a POINT of them being cliches, then you can get around it. The fourth line I REALLY REALLY like. I think that is the most inventive line I have heard in a while. But you hurt a bit with the fifth line. The whole point is to let people make their own conclusions. You can't spell everything out for them. The fact that you are writing in pencil SHOWS what you intend. You don't need to repeat it by saying "So i can erase..." Not a bad line on its own, but the fifth jsut harms a brilliant fourth. The last line is SOMEWHAT overused but here it works well.


Good. I like this. Not the best ever but good.

No no no. Don't force something this much. "bled" barely fits here at all and it is clear you just wanted it to rhyme.


Is this really the way you end the song? If so, its a nice touch. Usually I am not a fan of repetative lines, but this gives the impression that you are about to go through the whole thing again, which, if I'm not wrong, is exactly what the whole piece is trying to convey.

In all, you clearly know hwo to write. Very good job. Some forced rhymes, a few too many cliches and maybe a bit short at parts, but a couple of the liens are very good, and overall the theme is easy good as well. Flow is nice, although the rhyming at parts can harm it when you force the rhymes. Avoid that and you could make it even better.

well anybody needs work but i must say where you are wrong none of kevins wrtings are GENERIC But Genuine :jam: :jam: :jam:

OK, first off. Thank you all very much.
Second, I'm not actually a Staind fan. I have only heard a few songs from them. I did like from what I heard though.

Third, Thank you uncertaindrumer. I need more of that. I'm tired of getting told I'm good all the time.

Hey Kevin :) Nice one! How have you been? Haven't talked to you in a while ;)

:) :p :p :p :p

Hey Julie, thanks! I've been good, thank you. How have you been?
Much love <3

:) i will speak for her are old gal is kick ass i hope you dont mind julie