[Lady Valkyrie]

Altair I have to agree with you in the aspect of "needs". Today's society thinks that cable and satellite TV, telephone, and high speed internet are "needs". I've lived in poverty most of my life. There were times I had to choose between buying medicine for my kids or buying food for my kids. There have been a lot of times that I didn't have cable, phone, internet, a car, or the luxury of buying new clothes when I needed them. I had to go to Goodwill for clothes at times. There has been the really, really, hard times when I carried my water from a nearby creek, bioled it for drinking and for baths because I didn't have enough money to pay for my water bills and it got turned off. All this happened way before I even got on the drugs. So I have a proper perspective on what is a true need and what is a desire or a want that makes life more fun.

About the "need" for alcohol for the death of a loved one. What are the effects of alcohol beside the physical stammering slurred speech, and the stumbling about. It's the "numbing" effects. You are just numbing your feelings when you drink. The fact that the loved one is dead doesn't change. Sooner or later you will have to sober up and deal with the grieving process. I have been through many funerals concerning my own loved ones. I've also turned to the alcohol after my first husband left me and our children on my daughter's birthday with my best friend. That right there was like the grieving process. No matter how much I drank when I sobered up the fact that my husband left me and my best friend betrayed me hadn't changed. Also I was no closer to getting through the whole process to recieve the healing that I needed in my heart.

And LadySilk I have to disagree with you on the fact that the use of weed doesn't harm anyone. That is a blanket statement and doesn't pertain to all situations. Reread my previous post. I was harmed by my psychological addiction. And because of my lack of motivation due to the use of weed, the physical and emotional needs of my children were not met and they suffered big time. However, I do agree that cigarettes and alcohol have destroyed many lives and have taken our loved ones early in life. I'm in the process of a divorce from my second husband because of his alcoholism. His father was an alcoholic and also died from emphasima... he smoked 2 packs a day up til the day he was put into the hospital and there he died. His death has nearly destroyed that family. If the survivors in that family aren't alcoholics or drug addicts they are very materialistic and are addicted to shopping for their very expensive toys.

And finally about the music issue...

Music is in the soul. It is in the nature of every human to make music, whether by instrument or by their voices. Music is a part of the human heart. The messages of the music is what can have a positive or negative effect on a person. There are times when I listen to an aggressive type song because I'm mad. Sometimes I listen to a bluesy song or some jazz because I am depressed. I listen to the music to proccess the emotion and then I'm over it. However some people listen to aggressive or depressing music and they don't go through the proccess... they stay stuck in anger and depression and that poisons their heart. In that way music can have a negative affect. But to say that one should abstain from music is to give up something that is a part of your heart and soul. Music is a God given gift.