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Men always win!
this is an email...hopefully it provides a couple of laughs! :)
WOMEN'S REVENGE > >"Cash, check or charge?" I asked, after folding items the woman wished to >purchase. >As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a television >set in her purse. >"So, do you always carry your TV remote?" I asked. >"No," she replied, " but my husband refused to come shopping with me, >and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally." > >UNDERSTANDING WOMEN >(A MAN'S PERSPECTIVE) > > I know I'm not > >going to understand women. > I'll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, >pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, >and still be afraid of a spider. > >MARRIAGE SEMINAR > >While attending a Marriage Seminar dealing with communication, >Tom and his wife Grace listened to the instructor, >"It is essential that husbands and wives know each other's likes and >dislikes." >He addressed the man, >"Can you name your wife's favorite flower?" >Tom leaned over, touched his wife's arm gently and whispered, "It's >Pillsbury, isn't it? > >CIGARETTES AND TAMPONS > A man walks into a pharmacy and wanders up and down the aisles. >The sales girl notices him and asks him if she can help him. >He answers that he is looking for a box of tampons for his wife. >She directs him down the correct aisle. >A few minutes later, he deposits a huge bag of cotton balls and a ball of string on the counter. She says, confused, "Sir, I thought you were looking for some tampons >for your wife? > He answers, " You see, it's like this, >yesterday, I sent my wife to the store to get me a carton of cigarettes, > and she came back with a tin of tobacco and some rolling > papers; cause it's sooo-ooo--oo-ooo much cheaper. > So, I figure if I have to roll my own .......... so does she. > ( I figure this guy is the one on the milk carton! ) >WIFE VS. HUSBAND >A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word. >An earlier discussion had led to an argument and >neither of them wanted to concede their position. >As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs, >the husband >asked sarcastically, "Relatives of yours?" >"Yep," the wife replied, "in-laws." >W O R D S >A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a >day... >30,000 to a man's 15,000. >The wife replied, "The reason has to be because we have to repeat >everything >to men... >The husband then turned to his wife and asked, "What?" > CREATION > A man said to his wife one day, "I don't know how you can be >so stupid and so beautiful all at the same >time. > " The wife responded, "Allow me to explain. >God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; > God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you! >WHO DOES WHAT >A man and his wife were having an argument about who >should brew the coffee each morning. >The wife said, "You should do it, because you get up first, >and then we don't have to wait as long to get our coffee." >The husband said, " You are in charge of cooking around here and >you should do it, because that is your job, and I can just wait for my >coffee." >Wife replies, "No, you should do it, and besides, it is in the Bible >that >the man should do the coffee." >Husband replies, "I can't believe that, show me." >So she fetched the Bible, and opened the New Testament >and showed him at the top of several pages, that it indeed >says.........."HEBREWS" >The Silent Treatment >A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving each >other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next day, >he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning business >flight. >Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE) , he wrote on a >piece of paper, >"Please wake me at 5:00 AM." >He left it where he knew she would find it. >The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM >and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and >see why his wife hadn't wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by >the bed. The paper said, "It is 5:00 AM. Wake up." >Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests. > >God may have created man before woman, >but there is always a rough draft before the masterpiece. |
Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You Gotta Submit :laugh:
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not cool man.... only funny one was the cigarettes/tampons one
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lmao loved it
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Quote:
oh what? come on man it was hilarious...lol i loved the bit where the women saids i was created beautiful so you would be attracted to me, and i was created stupid so i would be attracted to you. :laugh: and men being the rough draft in creation was also funny.... |
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